Hello .. You pitiful huuman wormbaby

As a long time reader monkey .. first time writing monkey, I come bearing precious mind goo in regards to what made me extend my O_o .

Final fantasy 7 .. Many Peoples Favourite for obvious reasons ... The homo-erotic content of the game should be labelled on the box with a purple label or something .. The Honeybee inn's various scenes , Plus the whole Don corneo cross dressing thing made me weep with hidden delight.. its even possible to go on an intimate date with Barret. I wouldn't be surprised in the least if FFVII-2 features Cloud barret and an unfortunately named 3rd character all dressed in drag .. with magical boy transformations , I mean how good would that be ?!?!?!

Now to answer one of your previous questions .. the WORST character in an rpg is the main character from Secret of Evermore .. in the face of danger he likens it to a moment in a crappy fake movie , plus much like his look-alike Doogie Howser, he is stupidly weak .. having to rely on his mutant dog for help while he hits things with his array of lame weapons. his only use is that he can combine various ingredients and cast spells .. which is fun until you have to scour for ingredients and each new spell you get sucks until you level it up.

Well I did enjoy evermore somewhat ,the bazaar / trading section of the game is pretty huge and has had a bunch of effort put into it , but the deadbeat main character made me enjoy it much less, and the boss at the end of the game .. the evil robot butler CARLTRON makes baby Jesus cry .

And finally .. You have mentioned fruits basket somewhat feverishly , Do you know of an informative website about it ? id like to check it out before I check it out heh.

Lukewarm Regards
-Exo

p.s Have you seen Mahou Tsukai Tai ? a weird favourite of mine.

This is in response to Seifer's inquiry about seeing Squall running around on the New Game, Save, Load screen on FF6 for FF Anthology.

In FF5, a chibi Cloud Strife can be seen now and then walking around on the same screen. Though given that I use a PS2 to play a PS1 game... it usually screws it up and Cloud instead turns into the EVIL WALKING BLOCK OF DEATH!!!

Makes me wonder what little easter eggs they'll stick into the FF1 and FF2 remakes... though given the PS2's horrible emulation of PS1 games... ANOTHER EVIL WALKING BLOCK OF DEATH!!!

Since this is a Q&A column... ah... speculation?

~Fenrir

Hello, my cynical friend!

Why is it that so many people who submit opinions and questions to this Q&A board don't know the difference between "then" and "than"?

Why, all of a sudden, is it that "can't" and "doesn't" are being typed "ca'nt" and "does'nt"?

This is a REALLY dumb question: Why can't people agree to disagree regarding "the best Final Fantasy", "the best game that never made it big" and so on?

Here's a thought for all of you RPG fans who want to have their ideas and talents become part of the best RPG ever: collaborate! There's that guy (?) who wants to write just dialogue. There are all those people who hate ... ahem... have no tolerance for FMV. Some feel they can write a story with more depth and meaning than any of the big, money-driven companies. I'm not being sarcastic; I mean it! No one has to be "discovered". If Andrew and/or Google will allow it, all of you who want to make a great game send your contact information in to be shared with others of your ambition! "Power-ups to the people!" (Dude, what's up with that?)

If Zelda is an RPG, and if Parasite Eve is an RPG, why can't Oddworld be an RPG?

Thanks for the chance to rant and ponder the mysteries of our pasttimes!

-Wesley

Hi Andrew !

I just love the design of the rabbit in your sig. Somehow, it reminds me a lot of Max, as in Sam & Max. So here's my question... Is it :

a) some kind of a blatant ripp-off, err... I mean, an intentional tribute to Max the Hyperkinetic Rabbity Thing (TM) ?

b) actually unintentional, but now that you think about it, you might indeed have been unconsciously inspired by Max's original design when you made your sig ?

c) purely coincidental ?

d) just that I'm seeing similarities that aren't there ? O_o

e) none of my business ?

Thanks for you cooperation.

Entr0pi3

PS : What do you think of characters, places, etc., having their names inspired from various mythologies or other external reference sources, in many RPG ? Cool cultural references and neat-sounding names, or lack of originality/imagination and poor linguistical skills ? Although creating an RPG means creating a world, not anyone can be a J.R.R. Tolkien and make up their own mythology and a specific language for each culture appearing in their story, I guess. But does any major character/place/weapon/concept in a game really has to be named after an existing mythical stuff of some sort in order to sound credible, impressive and "meaningful" ??? I guess it's the easiest way, and those references, like stereotypes, can add something to the story when they're used well (i.e. in a both relevant and subtle way). What would be, in your opinion, examples of worst (overused and/or totally irrelevant) and best occurences of such references in an RPG ?

You want a game that can make you go 0_o? Okage: Shadow King! The only game I know of where the heroes are creepier than the villains! Mom! Kisling wants to clip my toenails! AGGH! ...sorry. Oh, just to add to this insanity, the worst character in an RPG would have to be Santa Claus. Yeah, that's right, Santa from Dual Hearts. You save his job and then he makes you race him for stuff! And he cheats! He flies! You can't fly! At least, not unless you do the flying race... Gah! I've never wanted to kick Santa's ass before!

Alloy "Yeah, I don't like pseudonyms either but last time I used my real name you called me a girl" Madison >8^()

PS My dad hates the characters from the Tales series too.

Yeah, you're right about Earthbound. I forgot how many royally screwed up moments that game had. Like the monsters. My personal favorite was probably the New Age Retro Hippy, or maybe the Old Party Dude. Then there were some of the bosses, like Master Barf. It was quite juvenile.

...DANG I miss that game.

(Ahem, and a Xenogears spoiler.) I think that there was one truly messed up moment in Xenogears, and no one agrees with me. Everyone thinks it's really epic and stuff, but when all the gears are sitting there crucified? Not only is the sight of a giant pink mouse on a cross kind of funny, but they're just giant robots! You can always just get out of them. Well, with the exception of poor Chu-chu.

What else...? Eh, can't think of any. Not a good time for thinking.

Wolfie :)

Hiya Andrew,

I love your column. You're entertaining and informative, and I hope you stick around a long long time.

I took your advice to NeonId and looked up "ingenuity" in the dictionary:

"1. the quality of being ingenious; cleverness, originality, skill, etc."

I think it's clear that NeonId properly used the word in its "originality" sense, meaning to say that an artist who can't think of a subject to work with, that hasn't been borrowed from someone else, doesn't possess the originality necessary for a future as an artist.

I see nothing wrong with either his use of the word, or his point, with which I agree. So, while NeonId may indeed be a nimrod, it isn't because he misunderstood the definition of the word "ingenuity." ;p

• Original movies.

• Summer of sequels! Can anyone say Rocky 52?!