Thoughts
By Sunday Knight
gundreamsasuka@aol.com

Cinnamon smoked hair
And glassy eyes
Simple lips
That just spill out so much
At one time

Quick
And clever tongue
That snaps its whip of words
Like an attacking snake
Leaving me to be the poor prey
Victim to the lashing

Tall
But slender build
You tower over me by only so much
But at times
You can be as high as the highest skyscraper
If you wanted to
Peering down at me
The little tiny ant that I am

What makes me to be so determined to
Be better than you?
Is it the words that are thrown from your mouth
Is it the feeling of hurt that makes me sick
With green shades of envy that makes me just want to
Explode
Like a balloon that is outwitted by the oncoming rock
That had flung from a slingshot?

What did I ever do to you to deserve this?
What did I do?
I can't help but wonder
If maybe
Just maybe
If the circumstances were different
That you would have been the best asset
The best friend
The best person that I would have ever known
If I could just get behind that jaded wall of hard marble...

I wish I were Diamond blades
And could just whiz through your tough air
Of ocean thick arrogance
As easily as a hot knife through butter
I wish to know
Like I wish for so many things
I wish to know the fox beneath the thick furs
I wish to know the crocodile beneath the coarse skin
I wish to know the one
Masked behind volcanic glass
Who's spirit seems to just burn with intense determination

I don't mean to damper your pride
I don't mean to provoke your senses
With my own haughty attitude
Though I find myself doing so
Just out of a hurting ego of mine

Would you like to know me?
Would you like to know the dog behind the loud barking
and rotting fences?
Would you like to know the rabbit
That is wounded in its hind legs
But tries to scamper and hop all the same?
Would you like to know the sad little boy under the hat
That is sitting in the rain
Like a sad little puppy that ran far
Far away from its home?

Have you ever cried
To the point where you hope that the rain would just come
And rinse away your eyes
So that no one would know that you are in pain?
Have you ever lost something so dear that you
And cried for hours on end
Baby tears streaking down your face
As you weep for what cannot be gotten back?
Have you ever smiled
For the heck of it
Your excuse being that it was a beautiful Sunny
Sunday afternoon?
Have you ever laughed so hard
That you fell to the floor
Because the air had escaped your lungs?

Do you even feel
Behind that conceited faŁade of yours?
Do you even feel
The sensation of your fingers
As you fluidly let your Pokemon out of their Red and White spheres
Victory already apparent in your flaming blue eyes?

Even after all this time
I can't recall
When this entire rivalry started between us
As if it has been that way since the beginning of time

Are we just vinegar and oil
Two ingredients that will never coincide with one another?
Or are we just black and white
And will end up smearing the landscape with shades of gray?

I might just be another misguided rock at your feet
But don't kick me out of your way
Don't underestimate me
For I will only strike back
With my own achievement
And glory...